Posted by Vivien on April 17, 2002 at 07:28:08:
In Reply to: Another perspective on faith and romance posted by Teresa Medeiros on April 15, 2002 at 12:04:15:
Thank you for that wonderful post! I feel exactly the same: love is a God-given miracle, something spiritual, and one unique way of expressing this love is through making love, which is perfectly natural. ;-) If an author chooses not to write about this, that's fine with me, but unless it is a Regency romance, which are generally very subdued as far as sexuality is concerned, I am not likely to pick up a book by the author again, as long as it is labelled "romance". I am more forgiving of other genres, I suppose, but in romance, the sex is the icing on the cake. As you said, when you get to know the characters, feel the sizzle between them, the tension, and then, bam, the bedroom door is slammed into your face, you simply feel cheated - or I do at least. :-) Maybe this is a bit of a voyeristic trait, maybe simple curiosity, but maybe also a wish for realism. For me, sex is part and parcel of our everyday lives. It's wonderful, refreshing and a beautiful way of showing love for another person. So even though romance novels may not be completely realistic, I expect this slice of realism from them, the showing of a physical relationship as well as a spiritual relationship. The two go hand in hand for me, and a perfect romance is one that achieves a balance between the two. Well, that's just my opinion and doesn't have a lot to do with the ongoing controversy. But all I can say is that being drawn to a person so irresistibly that you have sex before marriage and simply cannot wait for any official commitment is perfectly natural. This is why I like romances; they depict the attraction, the pull, wonderfully. Inspirational romances cannot give me that, they are too far removed from my own experiences in life. But to each her own. :-)And by the way, I agree that romances are very moral books at heart.
I also don't think Robin should be lynched for her opinion. But my perspective on Christians writing and reading romance is entirely different. After much study and struggle with this issue, I came to the conclusion that it's never a sin for an artist to try to depict life as accurately as possible, and that includes the sexual aspects of life. (Especially if you're not doing it just to titillate, a la PLAYBOY or HUSTLER.) That would be like saying Michaelangelo's David was "dirty and sinful" just because Michaelangelo chose to sculpt the human body in all of its naked glory.
: If I'm going to make my readers a part of my characters' lives, then I don't feel comfortable showing them all other aspects of that life, then slamming the bedroom door in their faces. Many people who don't read romances don't get this, but romances are actually incredibly moral books. The hero and heroine generally have a monogamous relationship that always ends in a lifelong commitment, usually marriage. I've probably become a MORE moral person by reading ad writing romance. I also don't feel like art is required to depict a perfect life. Sometimes it has a responsibility to depict life the way it really is.
: We attend the local Church of Christ, which is
: known to be a pretty conversative group. But we have an incredibly loving and positive church and not one person in all the years I've been
: published has ever said a negative word about my books. They announce my signings in the church bulletin. People pass books over the pew for me to sign before the sermon starts. Members come to my signings. Teachers swap my books back and forth at school. And when I went to my minister's house for a potluck, there on his wife's bedside table were all of my books neatly
: lined up. Boy, did that make me feel good!
: I believe God gave me my talent and I believe he wants me to use it for good. When I recently received a letter from a woman who had just undergone a hysterectomy and was afraid she'd never again feel sexual desire for her husband again...until she read CHARMING THE PRINCE, it simply validated that belief. I will always respect the beliefs of fellow Christians who aren't comfortable reading or writing explicit love scenes, but even if I decide to write for the Christian market someday, I will still be proud of every book I've written. And I'll always see romances as beautiful and spiritual books that celebrate the best of what love has to offer.
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