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Me and Mine (Gay Priest Romance) - By Sarah Goodwin
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xina



Joined: 22 Mar 2007
Posts: 6635
Location: minneapolis

PostPosted: Thu Aug 25, 2011 9:45 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Lee wrote:
No, thanks. Everyone has their hot button issues, and this book would cover all of them for me. The sexual abuse of children by priests was felt like a juggernaut by many US Catholics, causing many to leave the Church, as well as non-Catholics. I could never read this book without that in my head.
.



Yes, I am not Catholic, but I would have the same thoughts. It seems a romantic set-up that wouldn't work because of the sexual abuse of children by Catholic priests as reported in the news. I mean...what's next...boy scout leader and scout?
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Lee



Joined: 27 Mar 2007
Posts: 215

PostPosted: Thu Aug 25, 2011 9:51 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well, I think you've willfully insulted me then. I would never willfully misunderstand anyone.

You said "it's sort of like calling half of "The Time Travellers Wife' padeophilia - technically yes, but in the reality of it, no."

I took it to mean that you were saying that The TT's Wife technically had pedophilia in it.

There may be no child abuse in the book you're promoting. But the idea that it was a person in authority/trust falling for someone who came for counseling is still a hot issue button for me, whether it is psychiatrist/patient, teacher/student, etc. It skirts too close to immorality to me. Obviously, you and others don't have that issue.
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HideNothing



Joined: 23 Aug 2011
Posts: 7
Location: Bath

PostPosted: Thu Aug 25, 2011 9:59 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

The point is the subtlety of the thing. Which is what I was trying to say with the time travellers wife. The only other example I can think of is (oddly enough) sushi - people dismiss it as 'eww, raw fish' and miss the subtlety of it.

I apologise for any offence caused, but I feel like this is getting a little personal, as some of these posts seem to imply that there is something wrong with me reading this book. And it is quite frustrating trying to explain something that I've read to people who haven't read it, and who are getting the wrong idea.
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Lee



Joined: 27 Mar 2007
Posts: 215

PostPosted: Thu Aug 25, 2011 10:08 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I don't see one single post insulting you for your taste in reading. I do see people not at all interested in the topic of the book you're touting. And it's not that I don't see the subtlety of the book, it's just that I don't care for it, subtle or not.

I know it can be frustrating explaining a book to an audience that hasn't read it, but that's what happens when you introduce a book that has no wide distribution, knowing that it will definitely be a hot button issue for some whom you're trying to discuss it with. Were you really expecting a lot of responses that said, "Wow! That sounds interesting - I can't wait to read it!"? I don't think the responses on any other books board will be so diplomatic.
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Wendy AAR



Joined: 22 May 2010
Posts: 368

PostPosted: Thu Aug 25, 2011 1:25 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I would sooner read a book about sushi.
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BRN



Joined: 12 Nov 2010
Posts: 95
Location: USA

PostPosted: Thu Aug 25, 2011 2:10 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I absolutely love m/m romances. I'd read the one you mentioned if I read ebooks. I read one recently called A Promise of Tomorrow by Rowan McAllistar. It's available as an ebook too.
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Wendy AAR



Joined: 22 May 2010
Posts: 368

PostPosted: Thu Aug 25, 2011 4:29 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Lee wrote:
I know it can be frustrating explaining a book to an audience that hasn't read it, but that's what happens when you introduce a book that has no wide distribution, knowing that it will definitely be a hot button issue for some whom you're trying to discuss it with. Were you really expecting a lot of responses that said, "Wow! That sounds interesting - I can't wait to read it!"? I don't think the responses on any other books board will be so diplomatic.


Lee, my thoughts exactly.

I just can't see anything redeeming in a story about a priest getting it on with a teenage boy, regardless of future soul searching and redemption and whatever. It's still a Priest. Getting it on. With a CHILD. I can't imagine being a mother and finding this entertainment in any way.
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catgrace



Joined: 02 Jan 2008
Posts: 22

PostPosted: Thu Aug 25, 2011 4:36 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

18 years old is hardly a child. You don't have to read the story, but it's a shame to dismiss it because of panic about what it COULD BE, but isn't.

Editing to add: Perhaps panic is too strong a word, but someone else might read the comment and believe that this book contains sex with a child, when it's just not the case.
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Wendy AAR



Joined: 22 May 2010
Posts: 368

PostPosted: Thu Aug 25, 2011 4:51 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

First of all, the first post says that the young man is 17, not 18. But its not as if the year makes a difference. If it were my kid going to a priest for counseling and ending up having sex with the man (gay or not), I would be ready to commit murder. So yes, reading about it would be distasteful for me.
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Linda in sw va



Joined: 27 Mar 2007
Posts: 4708

PostPosted: Thu Aug 25, 2011 6:04 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

HideNothing wrote:


I apologise for any offence caused, but I feel like this is getting a little personal, as some of these posts seem to imply that there is something wrong with me reading this book. And it is quite frustrating trying to explain something that I've read to people who haven't read it, and who are getting the wrong idea.


I can see where you're coming from, I do agree that some judgements are being made without having read the book. I know it's hard not to take it personally when people are making negative moral judgements about a book you've very much enjoyed. It feels like an attack on you for having brought it up. For what it's worth I'd be willing to at least give it a try before shooting it down. I'm not seeing it in quite the extreme as some have suggested here, we're all so different.

So thanks for your post and it's always nice to hear someone rave about a book!

Linda
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Lee



Joined: 27 Mar 2007
Posts: 215

PostPosted: Thu Aug 25, 2011 7:19 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Actually, HideNothing, I was wondering if you were actually the author of this book, or knew the author, since both you and the author claim to be students in Bath.
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Cora



Joined: 12 Mar 2008
Posts: 1129
Location: Bremen, Germany

PostPosted: Thu Aug 25, 2011 9:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Bath is a city of approx. 90000 inhabitants and home to two universities with approx. 20000 students altogether. So while it's possible that the OP and the author are one and the same person, it's still a 1 in 20000 chance.

Besides, as other people have pointed out, consensual sex with a 17-year-old is neither pedophilia nor sexual child abuse. In the UK (since the author is apparently British), the legal age of consent is 16, regardless of sexual orientation. Of course, the fact that it's a relationship between a priest and a person come to this priest for confession and/or counselling is problematic. There might also be an ickiness factor involved, if the age gap is very big. But going by the description alone, I'd class this as an in-love-with-a-priest story like The Thornbirds rather than view it in the light of the various sexual abuse scandals in the Catholic church in recent years.

Would I read this book? I'm not sure. I'm not Catholic and I don't have issues with 17-year-olds having consensual sex. It's certainly a difficult topic and it depends on how the author handles it. I can see how other people might find it offensive, though.

But the mere act of pointing out a book that some people consider potentially offensive is not offensive in itself. Whenever the discussion here touches upon old school "bodiceripper" type romances like Stormfire or Whitney My Love or whatever and someone says that she won't read these books because of the pervasive violence against women and outright rape and sexual assault, a lot of people immediately show up to defend the books and call those posters close-minded, ignorant of the history of the romance genre and so on. Now personally, I cannot imagine how any woman could read and enjoy something like Stormfire, but I accept that many women feel differently and do indeed enjoy that book. And I have no problem with that at all, unless they are forcing me to read Stormfire.

Liking Stormfire and raving about it doesn't make anybody a bad person and is no justification for personal attacks. But neither is enjoying and recommending a book about a gay Catholic priest and a 17-year-old gay young man.
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Linda in sw va



Joined: 27 Mar 2007
Posts: 4708

PostPosted: Fri Aug 26, 2011 6:33 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Cora wrote:
Bath is a city of approx. 90000 inhabitants and home to two universities with approx. 20000 students altogether. So while it's possible that the OP and the author are one and the same person, it's still a 1 in 20000 chance.

Besides, as other people have pointed out, consensual sex with a 17-year-old is neither pedophilia nor sexual child abuse. In the UK (since the author is apparently British), the legal age of consent is 16, regardless of sexual orientation. Of course, the fact that it's a relationship between a priest and a person come to this priest for confession and/or counselling is problematic. There might also be an ickiness factor involved, if the age gap is very big. But going by the description alone, I'd class this as an in-love-with-a-priest story like The Thornbirds rather than view it in the light of the various sexual abuse scandals in the Catholic church in recent years.

Would I read this book? I'm not sure. I'm not Catholic and I don't have issues with 17-year-olds having consensual sex. It's certainly a difficult topic and it depends on how the author handles it. I can see how other people might find it offensive, though.

But the mere act of pointing out a book that some people consider potentially offensive is not offensive in itself. Whenever the discussion here touches upon old school "bodiceripper" type romances like Stormfire or Whitney My Love or whatever and someone says that she won't read these books because of the pervasive violence against women and outright rape and sexual assault, a lot of people immediately show up to defend the books and call those posters close-minded, ignorant of the history of the romance genre and so on. Now personally, I cannot imagine how any woman could read and enjoy something like Stormfire, but I accept that many women feel differently and do indeed enjoy that book. And I have no problem with that at all, unless they are forcing me to read Stormfire.

Liking Stormfire and raving about it doesn't make anybody a bad person and is no justification for personal attacks. But neither is enjoying and recommending a book about a gay Catholic priest and a 17-year-old gay young man.


Cora, this was well said! It makes me think of posts where someone will enjoy a book that has a forced seduction scene (as you mention) and then someone will reply that they couldn't possibly enjoy that book because they don't approve of rape in any form. It's a round about way of implying that the person that enjoyed the book did, though I know it's not intentional. People end up feeling attacked or judged when it's just a matter of two people seeing the same scenario in a different light.

Linda
ps - Cora did you know that Rob Thurman was in a car wreck and has been in critical condition for the past week?
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Lee



Joined: 27 Mar 2007
Posts: 215

PostPosted: Fri Aug 26, 2011 8:14 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Again, I fail to see where any personal attacks were made. No one said that someone reading this book is perverted or immoral or bad. Just that it wasn't our cuppa, and the reasons why. And wrt my question about whether the OP was written by the author or a friend of the author, it was just a question, not an accusation. I found it interesting that both the OP and the author were students in Bath. I thought this was a discussion board where opposing opinions were welcome.
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catgrace



Joined: 02 Jan 2008
Posts: 22

PostPosted: Fri Aug 26, 2011 8:53 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

It is. Smile

I think sometimes posts come across a little more strongly than was intended, on both sides in this case.

I'm still really enjoying this book, for the record.
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