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Does it bother you when someone dislikes a book you love?
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Kass



Joined: 23 Mar 2007
Posts: 722
Location: under a cockatiel

PostPosted: Thu Sep 18, 2008 11:30 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Are you pondering what I'm pondering?
--Well, I think so, Romance Brain, but how do we get the virgin midget into the rich tycoon's office in the first place?
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chiricahuagal



Joined: 07 May 2008
Posts: 210
Location: Houston

PostPosted: Thu Sep 18, 2008 12:58 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I think "ponder" has a little bit more... nuanced meaning? than "thinking" - I mean, I think all the time. I'm hungry. I need a glass of water. I need to go pick up the mail - I think those things inside my head as my body or brain reminds me to do so.

"hmmmmm...." (wondering why so many people thought this was good and I thought it was crap and what I missed that they saw...) "hmmmmm...." (that's me pondering this issue) Maybe it's a more active and involved verb than "think"
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Gail K.



Joined: 19 May 2007
Posts: 1292

PostPosted: Thu Sep 18, 2008 6:54 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Schola wrote:
Since this thread has been revived, I'm suprised that the fans of The Marriage Bed haven't chimed in about that.



You know, reading the latest responses on TMB thread, I think the converse of this question should be asked:

Why does it bother you when people like a book YOU don't like??
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Tee



Joined: 22 Mar 2007
Posts: 4209
Location: Detroit Metro

PostPosted: Thu Sep 18, 2008 7:24 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Gail K. wrote:
You know, reading the latest responses on TMB thread, I think the converse of this question should be asked:
Why does it bother you when people like a book YOU don't like??

It really doesn't bother me one way or another, Gail. But unless we voice our individual opinions of books we've read, we would never have any discussions on this site. So sometimes these discussions sound as though we're bothered by others' opinions, but I think it's more that we're trying to understand what it was that someone liked about a book we personally didn't enjoy, or vice versa. We're doing it to keep AAR alive and kicking. Laughing
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Gail K.



Joined: 19 May 2007
Posts: 1292

PostPosted: Thu Sep 18, 2008 7:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Tee, there's a diff between thoughtful discussion and an insistence on having the last word, like a pitbull (lipsticked?) with a bone.
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Tee



Joined: 22 Mar 2007
Posts: 4209
Location: Detroit Metro

PostPosted: Thu Sep 18, 2008 7:32 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Gail K. wrote:
Tee, there's a diff between thoughtful discussion and an insistence on having the last word, like a pitbull (lipsticked?) with a bone.

Yeah--there is that too. Oh, well--I tried! Very Happy
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Amanda



Joined: 25 Aug 2008
Posts: 289
Location: the midwest

PostPosted: Thu Sep 18, 2008 7:49 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I know very few people who will admit to reading romance novels and I find that I'm very frustrated trying to have an intelligent conversation about the book I just read with the few people who do. These forums give us an oportunity to discuss plot devises, characterizations, motivations and the feelings they generate within us. As a result, I think people get so passionate about their experiences with this type of book that they may be a bit over zealous. I think we just get so excited to talk about a part of our lives we go a bit crazy and may come across as 'bothered' during discussions. Really, it's a lot to ponder. Wink
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Linda in sw va



Joined: 27 Mar 2007
Posts: 4708

PostPosted: Fri Sep 19, 2008 5:52 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Gail K. wrote:

Why does it bother you when people like a book YOU don't like??


Oh I like this one, good question!

Linda
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Schola



Joined: 10 Jun 2007
Posts: 1867

PostPosted: Fri Sep 19, 2008 7:48 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Gail K. wrote:
Schola wrote:
Since this thread has been revived, I'm suprised that the fans of The Marriage Bed haven't chimed in about that.



You know, reading the latest responses on TMB thread, I think the converse of this question should be asked:

Why does it bother you when people like a book YOU don't like??


Touche! Laughing I set myself up for that one, didn't I?

Actually, like Dick, I usually assume I have the better opinion and just keep silent about it. (I was a model of discretion the year Dan Brown was so hot. Evil or Very Mad ) I'm more talkative here because it's a message board . . . and because there's another thread about how the boards have been so slow lately. (Yes, everyone, I'm just doing my part! Laughing )
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Tee



Joined: 22 Mar 2007
Posts: 4209
Location: Detroit Metro

PostPosted: Fri Sep 19, 2008 8:16 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Schola wrote:
I'm more talkative here because it's a message board . . . and because there's another thread about how the boards have been so slow lately. (Yes, everyone, I'm just doing my part! Laughing )

Excellent way of looking at it, Schola. I'm proud of your stepping up to the plate so admirably. Laughing
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Gail K.



Joined: 19 May 2007
Posts: 1292

PostPosted: Fri Sep 19, 2008 8:45 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Schola, there's also a diff between continuing a conversation for the sake of offering variant opinions and continuing a conversation for the sake of continuing, once the main opinions from all sides have already been expressed. But, carry on...I'm going to amuse myself on other threads Cool

This is what I don't get about the Wild Wild West board, either. Clearly we all come in with strong stances...Very few minds will be changed. Oh well, I guess the human race is just programmed to be argumentative...especially those attracted to internet boards Wink
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Schola



Joined: 10 Jun 2007
Posts: 1867

PostPosted: Fri Sep 19, 2008 9:05 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm not sure what you mean, Gail. I mean, if we all gave our varying opinions and left it at that, it wouldn't seem like a conversation to me. It would be more like a survey: say your piece and leave it at that. I like the give and take of saying what we think of others' opinions--even if it sometimes seems like an argument.

I see a lot of threads die a natural death when I feel that there is a lot more to be said--and not just by locquacious me, I might add! Embarassed
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Gail K.



Joined: 19 May 2007
Posts: 1292

PostPosted: Fri Sep 19, 2008 9:09 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I guess I have a lower tolerance than most, Schola, for repetition of ideas...not to mention a shorter attention span! This is sorta what I meant when I said I wanted "new blood" to chime in on these boards. To keep things fresh. I get bored when it's the same regulars chiming in with the same "type" of opinions, which, honestly, I can predict after a while. Anyway, sorry if my explanation offends but that's just how I feel.
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dick



Joined: 22 Mar 2007
Posts: 2475

PostPosted: Fri Sep 19, 2008 10:30 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

to gailk: I sense that some of the opinions expressed, or perhaps the perseverance of some posters has made you angry. If I was one of those, I regret that my doing so led to your anger. Still, don't you think that even re-iterated opinions often expose something more to discuss? I will admit to becoming attached to my own thoughts, as others do also. Don't you do that as well? I have no quarrel with those who like a book I don't like, but I'm always willing to discuss the elements of the book which led to my dislike of it and willing to read yours.

Isn't that what the directions at the beginning of the boards ask us to do?
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Gail K.



Joined: 19 May 2007
Posts: 1292

PostPosted: Fri Sep 19, 2008 11:00 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

dick wrote:
to gailk: I sense that some of the opinions expressed, or perhaps the perseverance of some posters has made you angry. If I was one of those, I regret that my doing so led to your anger. Still, don't you think that even re-iterated opinions often expose something more to discuss? I will admit to becoming attached to my own thoughts, as others do also. Don't you do that as well? I have no quarrel with those who like a book I don't like, but I'm always willing to discuss the elements of the book which led to my dislike of it and willing to read yours.

Isn't that what the directions at the beginning of the boards ask us to do?


Hi dick,

No need for regrets; I'm not angry so much as exasperated. And I'm taking out my exasperation on this thread because it was brought up. I started out the week excited to share the news that yay! I found good books to read in Romance for once. Of course I don't expect everyone to share my likes and dislikes. I guess I feel like my parade is being rained on a bit Crying or Very sad After years of posting on this site, I'm sensitive to that as I used to do it to others, as has been pointed out to me in the past, I think. And I'm still following TMB thread but with the exception of Schola re-reading and re-thinking some of her original ideas, I don't find new insights being added. I do like hearing from the newer posters who were not involved in the "original" debate, however!

-Gail
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