I’m sad about that, though. I think the discussion we’ve had here (can’t speak of the Twitterverse, as I don’t partake) has been valuable in airing our differences of opinion. There will always be differences of opinion, and there will always be people who will tell you are an idiot – in less-than-kind phrases, for having that opinion.

First, does anyone know if any studies have been done to show whether or not men are more prone to rape after viewing por**graphy or strip acts? I’m asking about po**ogrpahy in particular because of AAR Rachel’s comment: “So I’d just as soon not have women teasing men into a frenzied rage and looking to vent that rage on a bystander to this sexual chaos (me). ” The implication is that a man so ‘teased’ into a sexual frenzy will take out the supposed *extreme sexual frustration* on any handy woman.And then… what do you all think? If a study WERE to show that to be true – I’m not assuming it would, because I truly don’t know – do you think that the po**ography or strip act became an incitement to rape because of the sexual content , *or* because it showed women as less-than-men, there for men to use sexually, if they so chose?
Personally, I think it would be dangerous to assume that the sexual content in po**ography is all there is to it, because the subtext contains a message about a woman’s worth and her purpose on earth. I believe it subverts the truth by showing only one side of her life, the sexual part, and so likely encourages a warped view of women’s position in the world. *But*… and it’s a big *but*… only to men who are already inclined to view women that way. I don’t believe it can make anyone think a certain way, but it could support a belief system already in place.In a similar way *if*, as AAR Rachel posited, a man was likely to rape any handy woman after being sexually teased, would it not more likely say something about that man’s sense of his lack of power in the world, and his desire to put women in their place (under him) than some imagined sexual overload that made him ‘crazed’?The men I know and have known over my lifetime see women, for the most part, as equals, and therefore rape is as horrible a concept for them as it is to me.I will never, have never, can’t imagine, writing a *romance* with rape in it, and would not read one. Rape is an abhorrent act and not about sex at all, but about power, and the loss of it.

Donna,

Many years ago there was a study done regarding violent reaction and porn which showed that men do have violent reactions to it. Many people had problems with the way the study was conducted.

This study, more recent, disagrees:

http://psychcentral.com/news/2009/12/02/pornographys-effect-on-men-under-study/9884.html

I think part of the problem in this discussion is that we seem to be discussing many different types of rape. I don’t think they are all caused by the same thing. Rape, the kind where a man grabs you in a parking lot, can actually not include sex. Penetration can occur with a stick or something else the rapist finds relevant (or convenient.) Everything I have been taught about it says this kind of rape is strictly violent, victims picked for vulnerability as opposed to lust.

Date rape, from my understanding of it, is a sense of entitlement. Still rape but different motivation and different circumstances.

I thought, like others, the rape we were talking about was two drunk people going back to a guys dorm room and the girl having regrets in the morning. Not the girl saying no and him pushing the issue (rape). Not the girl being too drunk and him continuing on (rape — and an added touch of necrophilia maybe??) IMO, if you are drunk but WILLING and have sex and regret it in the morning, not rape. You can blame the alcohol for clouding your morals but you can’t blame the guy. Many times in college my friends and I found ourselves asking “How could you let me?” in the mornings. But the fact is, drunks don’t make good chaperons for other drunks. Finding out something you did while drunk was dumb or disgusting doesn’t make it someone else’s fault.

If your drunk but UNWILLING, then regardless of how you are dressed or what you are doing it is still rape.

Sort of (though far worse) like theft. If I leave my purse out, I am careless. But the thief is still the criminal, not me.

maggie b.

AAR Sandy and AAR Rachel *clearly* have very different views, so they can’t *both* be speaking for the site’s ‘official policy’, so how do you figure one is, and one isn’t? Why is the one you disagree with magically the site policy? I don’t get it.

Anyway… I, too, disagree vehemently with any and all posts/posters that assume men, even ‘lickered up’, are slavering beasts that can’t control themselves. If you follow that train of thought, then any man who drinks too much, gets behind the wheel of a car and kills someone must be excused, because ‘he was drunk and couldn’t control himself’. Really. Please. So the other innocent driver who got killed should have *known* better than to be on the road when the bars let out, because there are drunk drivers out there?

Also… to blame scantily clad women for rape is the height of ridiculousness. As people have pointed out, nuns get raped, elderly women get raped, rape has NOTHING to do with lust, and everything to do with a patriarchal society that lingers, giving SOME men the idea that women are to be used, controlled, dominated, etc. Until we correct that thought – and I do think we’re making progress – it will continue. Hiding in our rooms isn’t going to help.

I want to ask a few serious questions:

First, does anyone know if any studies have been done to show whether or not men are more prone to rape after viewing por**graphy or strip acts? I’m asking about po**ogrpahy in particular because of AAR Rachel’s comment: “So I’d just as soon not have women teasing men into a frenzied rage and looking to vent that rage on a bystander to this sexual chaos (me). ” The implication is that a man so ‘teased’ into a sexual frenzy will take out the supposed *extreme sexual frustration* on any handy woman.

And then… what do you all think? If a study WERE to show that to be true – I’m not assuming it would, because I truly don’t know – do you think that the po**ography or strip act became an incitement to rape because of the sexual content , *or* because it showed women as less-than-men, there for men to use sexually, if they so chose?

Personally, I think it would be dangerous to assume that the sexual content in po**ography is all there is to it, because the subtext contains a message about a woman’s worth and her purpose on earth. I believe it subverts the truth by showing only one side of her life, the sexual part, and so likely encourages a warped view of women’s position in the world. *But*… and it’s a big *but*… only to men who are already inclined to view women that way. I don’t believe it can make anyone think a certain way, but it could support a belief system already in place.

In a similar way *if*, as AAR Rachel posited, a man was likely to rape any handy woman after being sexually teased, would it not more likely say something about that man’s sense of his lack of power in the world, and his desire to put women in their place (under him) than some imagined sexual overload that made him ‘crazed’?

The men I know and have known over my lifetime see women, for the most part, as equals, and therefore rape is as horrible a concept for them as it is to me.

I will never, have never, can’t imagine, writing a *romance* with rape in it, and would not read one. Rape is an abhorrent act and not about sex at all, but about power, and the loss of it.